Diary of a God

SL5B - Linden Lab Proclaims Child Avatars Only For Sex

2008-06-02T07:18:00.000-07:00

The upcoming 5th Birthday celebration of Second Life™ by Linden Lab™ is designed for:

'Celebrating the cultural diversity of Second Life': 'Who do you hang around with in Second Life? What are your communities' traditions and signature characteristics? Are you proud of your sexy blue fur? Your excruciatingly detailed tea ceremony? Your murky environments? Your sculptures? The help you've given to others?'

The celebration is being held in a PG area, so Linden Lab™ doesn't want any displays that are not of a PG nature; fair enough. Note that given the statement above, even Linden Lab™ knows that 'sexy' can be PG. So sexy is okay, as long as it's not 'adult' (R or X rated).

So... despite celebrating the cultural diversity of Second Life™ there are some groups forbidden to display exhibits. Which groups are these? Glad you asked!

The "Gor" community -- apparently Linden Lab™ feels the Gor community is not suitable for a PG environment, which means they are a mature/adult group that would rate an 'R' or 'X' rating.

The "BDSM" community -- apparently Linden Lab™ feels the BDSM community is not suitable for a PG environment, which means they are a mature/adult group that would rate an 'R' or 'X' rating.

The "Child Avatars" community -- apparently Linden Lab™ feels the Child Avatars community is not suitable for a PG environment, which means they are a mature/adult group that would rate an 'R' or 'X' rating.

Um... come again?

This isn't about protecting real life kids; real life kids are on the Teen Grid, not the Main Grid. Real life kids, should they get on the Main Grid, will be using an adult avatar, as they will be wanting to experience things as an adult; they won't be using a child avatar.

Child avatars are not banned from Second Life™, so there is nothing inherently against the Terms of Service or Community Standards about child avatars. Linden Lab™ has stated that child avatars are allowed in Second Life™.

So what's the problem?

The Gor community, which is allowed in Second Life™ but features a heavy content of sex and violence, is not permitted to have an exhibit at the SL5B celebration in a PG area.

The BDSM community, which is allowed in Second Life™ but features a heavy content of sex and violence, is not permitted to have an exhibit at the SL5B celebration in a PG area.

The Child Avatar community is not permitted to have an exhibit at the SL5B celebration in a PG area.

So what's the common connection? Apparently, Linden Lab™ believe that all three groups feature a heavy sexual content and are inappropriate for a PG area.

There you have it, folks: Linden Lab™ believes that child avatars are only for deviant sexual practices, just like Gor and BDSM.

All hail the Main Grid. All hail Linden Lab™ and their infinite wisdom.

All hail Mark Kingdon, aka M Linden, the CEO of Linden Lab™. Since this is official Linden Lab™ policy, Mark has endorsed it.

Those of you with child avatars, you're on notice: Mark Kingdon thinks you're only using Second Life™ for deviant sexual purposes.

Fever For The Flavor Of A...

2007-08-17T15:06:00.000-07:00

RichardR Bleac: "I have this strange desire to lick Kanjii characters...."

Timing is Everything

2007-08-08T14:15:00.000-07:00

[via IM, when the grid finally came back up from hours of downtime]

Solomon Devoix: "Thank god! I'm finally in!!!"

Anputeti Blabbermouth falls on the floor laughing..."Dude, you have no idea how hilarious that timing was! Caught someone in the maze, and been stripping and tormenting her for 2.5 hours. Guess what I finally did as you sent that?"

Solomon Devoix: [facepalm]

Different Strokes

2007-05-01T11:05:00.000-07:00

Weechee Zinner waves a hand and melts into a nearby shadow.

Maryld Althouse waves her tongue and melts Wee into a wetspot...

Team Spirit

2007-04-28T00:36:00.000-07:00

Hughes Howard: "cathy... Ghost of Linden got you..."

Limbo Lower Now... How Low Can You Go?

2007-04-27T11:15:00.000-07:00

Grayscale Heidenstam: "I was trapped in sex club limbo."

The Flavor of Success

2007-02-28T20:36:00.000-08:00

Oracle Greatrex: "I could never actually enter your museum. The damage costs from my drool alone would be astronomical."

High Time (with a nod to the Grateful Dead)

2007-02-26T19:43:00.000-08:00

Sachdev Saiman: "The years have been good to me ... it's the decades that hurt..."

I Can See Clearly Now

2007-02-16T19:10:00.001-08:00

Gnash Rambler hopes he doesn't see the Donny Osmond poster, cause it would probably crash his bifocals.

Gnash Rambler: "Mother Nature has called a few times, and I've refused to answer. She's gonna come over here with Vinnie and Guido and bust down the door and fit me for a cement toilet seat pretty soon."

Keeping Abreast of the Situation

2007-02-13T19:28:00.001-08:00

YummyPopcorn Antwerp: "I think these boobs are getting magical powers."

On a Wing and a Prayer

2007-02-13T09:59:00.000-08:00

Minako Chabrow:

"Our Lindens, who art in the Labs,
Hallowed be thy prims.
Thy Grid-dom come, thy will be done,
On sims, as it is in The Preview.
Give us this day our daily crash,
And forgive us our Spammery.
As we forgive those, who greif against us
And lead us not, into private parcels.
Amen."

German: The Language of Love?!?

2007-02-12T15:13:00.000-08:00

YummyPopcorn Antwerp: How do you say "Are you supposed to have boobs, too?" in German?

Alyson Rosmer: I may be the girl next door and a pin-up darling, but it'll take a lot for you to pin me up...

Attack of the Meat By-Products

2007-02-11T20:57:00.000-08:00

Misha Corleone: "My meatloaf is trying to eat my chicken."

Objects in mirror are larger than they appear...

2007-02-08T08:50:00.001-08:00

Misha Corleone: "Oh, trust me, I know... my clit runs out of room..."

Misha Corleone: "I'm going to start editing my ass... I'm going to put something in my ass that's specifically for YOU..."

Meat The Neighbors

2007-02-05T09:46:00.000-08:00

Darien Kazakov: "Yes, I admit it... I have carnivorous skirts. You don't want to know about my panties."

Bare Necessities

2007-01-29T09:25:00.000-08:00

Adam Hickman: "The great thing about being a dancer AND security is the look on somebody's face when they realize they're being ejected from the club by a naked guy."

Solomon Devoix: "I know it has to be the geek in me, but I can't stop wondering... how do you keep the lollipop from sticking to your fangs?"

Tools for the Well-Spoken Second Life Citizen

2007-01-28T17:13:00.000-08:00

Ismelda Alonzo: "Sorry, it seems I have a lack in vocabulary today... I don't know essential words... 'pedophile', 'zoophile', 'satyrs'... very essential words in SL..."

Tell Me A Bedtime Story

2007-01-28T08:46:00.000-08:00

On Saturday night, Club Reese's held an event with a 'fairytale' theme. A LOT of innuendo flew around that night; this is just one example:

Solomon Devoix [as a satyr]: "So your name is 'Chalice'? Have you ever been... drunk?"

Chalice Yao: "Um... no?"

Solomon Devoix: "Would you like to be?" [licks his lips]

It's a Jungle Out There...

2007-01-26T20:09:00.000-08:00

At Club Reese's: "Naked purple vampire kitty fairy DJ in the house!!"

Alister Redgrave: "How many people can unbotton their own pants with their tail?"

Fashion Jihad

2007-01-25T08:31:00.000-08:00

Misha Corleone: "Misha Corleone vows to smite all clothing standing between naked bodies and her appreciation of the nude form."

Alyson Rosmer: "What you see, and what I feel, are two different things."

Horseshoes and Handgrendes

2007-01-23T18:36:00.000-08:00

Okay, I said I was going to put a few of the things I've heard in Second Life here for other people to enjoy, so let's get started with that.

Maryld Althouse: "Maryld Althouse fondles her breasts, runs her hands down her tummy, back up her butt, and over her grenades...."

Misha Corleone: "No painting the orange vampire."

S. Smalls: "I'm your basic gender-flipping, now-and-then-septagenarian, kung-fu-fighting werewolf. You know the type."

Solomon Devoix: "Of all the things I expected to see in life... Second or Real... a naked, breakdancing Ventrue was not one of them."

Overheard by Katar Supercharge: "How can I fly to you with my cock?"

Ariel Maloney: "Life is like a dick; when it gets hard... fuck it!"

Dear Diary...

2007-01-22T17:56:00.000-08:00

With the simplest of thoughts, I unfetter myself from the surly chains of gravity and hurl myself skyward, becoming brother to the clouds. The land itself answers to my will, valleys appearing and hills being born at my command. Items, machines, even entire castles are summoned into being by a thought... and banished back into the void the same way. There is no construct so great I cannot shift it, no height so great I cannot overcome it.

My name is Solomon Devoix, and I am a god.

My name is Solomon Devoix, and this is my Second Life.

-----

Okay... Olympian generalities aside, if you're reading this, you probably already know what Second Life is. If you don't... in short, it's a huge, shared virtual world. Unlike games like World of Warcraft or City of Heroes, most of the content in Second Life is created by the inhabitants. It is not a game in the traditional sense... there are no "missions", no levels, no villians to bash or monsters to kill and loot their bodies. Second Life is just what the name says... a second, albeit virtual, life. Check it out at http://secondlife.com/

In a way, a lot of what can be done just as a matter of course in Second Life feels like the things that the gods out of myth were supposed to be capable of... hence the title of this blog and the opening paragraph. Overblown? Probably. But it just seems so completely appropriate...

Now, as awesome as Second Life is... it's not without its problems. Many of these are ongoing, frustrating, and most residents have the impression the Lindens (the true gods of SL) care nothing for the inhabitants... only for driving up the "total residents" number to attract backers (advertisers) no matter how much this overburdens the system for the paying residents and long-term (paying or not) residents.

Still... this is NOT a case of "I come not to praise Caesar, but to bury him." While the problems of Second Life are many and vexing... I feel that it is worth enduring for the other benefits, and have seen some hopeful signs from the Lindens of forthcoming improvements. Only time will tell.

Mostly I started this blog to record "choice" pieces of conversation I've heard in Second Life -- things that I think are funny, witty, or just out-and-out wierd. I'm also planning to eventually add snapshots of myself (in Second Life), my fiance, and other friends and such as time and energy permits.

Until then...